National Watermelon Day / Chris Porter Night

Did you guys know watermelon is 92% water? That means it’s 92% too healthy for us. It was apparently cultivated because of it’s ability to hold water in the desert which makes it a glorified fucking chalice… like a camel. It is a fruit imposter. Disgusting.

Pineapples hold joy but they don’t have a website and a lobbying group like big watermelon.

So anyway we’re going to appreciate watermelons on August 4 because SOMEONE in this group is a fan. Not gonna say who, that would be embarrassing.

This is all just an excuse to drink at Sean’s house anyway. We will meet at Sean’s whenever we can get there after work... between 6-8. I’m brining the huge deck of cards and Wesley can bring his watermelon power point presentation. You don't have to bring anything but if Andrea doesn't bring a tequila jello watermelon I'm going to be totally disappointed.

Then we are going to a FREE comedy show at South Point called “Dirty at 12:30”. We shall be drunk by the time we arrive at this event, hopefully from a watermelon chalice full of tequila jello or whatever gay watermelon wine Katie brings. <br>

My new favorite comedian Chris Porter will be going on stage and here is a clip of him. He's also funny when you're sober.