CAH & Champagne: Baby Free Brunch
Let’s do this on Sunday at 2pm because I don’t actually know when church ends.
I’m a parent, so no one hates kids more than I do. But it’s Baby Safety month, guys! I may be grossly misunderstanding the point of Baby Safety month, but I’m celebrating by getting my uterus ripped out. I can’t be having 9 months of sobriety, so safety first!
This also means I will be having major surgery and I might die in the first week of October. So you should come to my goodbye brunch or you may never see me or my uterus ever again. Also, none of you are invited to my funeral because I won’t be here to organize it for you.
Let’s do this on Sunday at 2pm because I don’t actually know when church ends, but I know you’re all going to be there. We’ll play Cards Against Humanity to keep things horrible, but otherwise this is a super classy adult champagne brunch.
Bring something breakfasty! This is a breakfast potluck so you must bring something if you want to play cards with us. Poptarts, donuts, eggs, waffles, biscuits and gravy. I can literally name a million breakfast foods so let us know what you’re brining so everyone doesn’t bring Poptarts like fucking animals.
Until then, I’ll be over here just hurdling into the abyss of old age.